What Hurts the Most Read online

  What Hurts the Most?

  A Novel By:

  Tynessa

  Synopsis: What Hurts The Most?

  What hurts the most is letting go. Being in a relationship with ladies’ man, Jay’vion, Asia is ready to throw in the towel. Jay’vion is the true definition of the song ‘Can’t Raise a Man.’ Having a hard time being faithful and committing himself to Asia, he finds himself alone and lonesome. The last woman has approached Asia for the last time, and though letting go might be the hardest thing she’s ever had to endure, she knows it’s something she has to do.

  What hurts the most is falling for another man when you already have one of your own. Tangela has always lived by the rule of loyalty, even if her man is serving a five-year sentence. When she meets irresistible, fresh out of prison Quintez, she knows to stay far away from his kind. Little does she know, whatever Quintez wants, he gets. That includes her. Will Tangela continue to be loyal to her man, or will Quintez be one temptation she will not be able to fight? This is one rollercoaster ride you don’t want to miss.

  Text LEOSULLIVAN to 22828 to join our mailing list!

  To submit a manuscript for our review, email us at [email protected]

  © 2015 Tynessa

  Published by Leo Sullivan Presents

  www.leolsullivan.com

  All rights reserved.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Unauthorized reproduction, in any manner, is prohibited.

  Acknowledgments

  First, I would like to thank God for giving me this gift and the ability to stay focused. To my #1 fan, my mom Varnessa (Rena) Mack, I can’t even begin to describe how much I love you. Thanks for being you and for all the love that you continue to give me. I love you more than life itself! To my aunt Trellis (Gail) Watson, you are the one true person that I can share anything with and won’t judge me. You are more like my best friend than my aunt and I love you more than you will ever know. Thanks ladies, for encouraging me to not give up, and for always listening to all my ideas and even adding a few of y’all own. I love you ladies more than anything in this world! I would also like to give a special shout out to my dad Michael (Big Mike) Mack for your love and support. I love you more than anything! Also, shouts out to my little brother and nephews Mi’kerriun, Johntavious, and Jahiem Mack. I love you guys so much. To my little/big sister Knykayshia, I love you so much girl!

  TO MY GRANDFATHER: I can’t begin to describe how much I love you. You mean the world and more to me, Matthew Watson!!! Keep being the OG that you are!!!

  Shout out to ALL my cousins, aunts, and uncles: I love you all from the bottom of my heart. Thanks for the love and support that ya’ll give. We might argue and fight but at the end of the day we’re family and ALWAYS have each other’s backs. I love ya’ll to the moon and back!

  To my bookie: Thanks for always being there for me and giving your opinions when I need them—whether I like them or not. You work my nerves sometimes but I wouldn’t trade what we have for anything. No one understands us—but US! I cherish our friendship to the fullest.

  Shout out to Leo Sullivan and family: Thanks for accepting me with open arms. My hittas; love you ladies and you know who you are.

  Free my cousins Rick, Quan, Marc, and Jroc: I know y’all will be touching down soon and I can’t wait.

  I dedicate this book to my four angels that are watching over me, Nellie Jo (Grandma Jackie) Hammock, Johnnie Mae (MeMamma) Watson, Quinterrance (Quinn) Watson and Allen (T.A. Tuddy) Watson. I love and miss y’all so much and I know the four of you would be so proud of me. (I still find it hard to believe y’all are gone) REST IN PEACE! Also, R.I.P. Moon and Debbie. Y’all are definitely being missed!

  To my readers: Thanks for the love and support. You guys are truly appreciated and I could never thank y’all enough! YOU GUYS ROCK!!!!

  Have to shout my girl Carmen Johnson out: I don’t even know where to begin with this crazy chick. From day one you have been a hot mess. Lol…Four and five o’clock in the morning I’m up laughing because you’re in my inbox talking smack. You have become one of my favs and thanks for the love and support.

  If I forgot anyone, please don’t blame it on my heart; blame it on my mind.

  Hope y’all enjoy!

  Chapter 1: Fresh Out the Pen!

  Chapter 2: Lust at First Sight!

  Chapter 3: No Love From Me!

  Chapter 4: How to Love, He Ain’t Got a Clue!

  Chapter 5: Love in the Club!

  Chapter 6: Fighting Temptation!

  Chapter 7: Street Nigga!

  Chapter 8: I’m Cool, You’re Cool, We’re Cool!

  Chapter 9: Best Mistake Ever!

  Chapter 10: Woman to Woman!

  Chapter 11: A Mother’s Love!

  Chapter 12: Mama Knows Best!

  Chapter 13: I Hurt, You Hurt!

  Chapter 14: Our Little Secret!

  Chapter 15: Listening to My Heart!

  Chapter 16: Maybe I Deserve!

  Chapter 17: Best I Ever Had!

  Chapter 18: A New Feeling!

  Chapter 19: Coo-Coo For Cocoa Puffs!

  Chapter 20: Bury My Heart!

  Chapter 21: I Am My Brother’s Keeper!

  Chapter 22: Lesson Learned!

  Chapter 23: Hard to Say Goodbye!

  Chapter 24: I’m My Own Man!

  Chapter 25: Decisions, Decisions!

  Facebook: Tynessa Watson

  Email: [email protected]

  Instagram: m1ss_ty

  Twitter: @AuthorTynessa

  Chapter 1

  Fresh Out the Pen!

  Quintez

  Walking out of the Atlanta Federal Penitentiary, I spotted my big head ass brother, Jay’vion, right away. A nigga was feeling good as hell. I was fresh out the pen and ready to lay up in something warm and gushy. The way I was feeling, I was cuffing the first bitch I saw. Nah, fuck that. After serving four years in that shit, I was getting all the pussy I could. Fuck cuffing a bitch up! Yo’ boy had a lot of making up to do.

  I strolled over to what I assumed was my brother’s cocaine white Bugatti with black 22-inch rims and black tinted windows. That nigga always had been the flashy type since I could remember. That shit was hard as hell, though.

  “What’s up, li’l nigga?” my brother said as he embraced me in a big ass hug. Jay’vion was the oldest between the two of us. Nigga was twenty-seven; only two years older than me, but if you didn’t know any better, you would have thought the nigga was my pops instead of my big brother.

  Though Jay’vion was the man in the streets and the nigga you spoke to when you needed your next fix, he tried his damnedest to keep me away from the drug game. I was around fourteen/fifteen when I was first introduced to the world of drugs. Jay’vion didn’t like it one bit, but he knew there was no stopping me. I was a paper chaser and was willing to get money by any means. Robbing niggas, carjacking mothafuckas, whatever brought in the cash my ass was on it. All the while I was slanging major dope. Like I said, my brother didn’t like it; however, he would rather me collaborate with him than sell for the next mothafucka’.

  I wasn’t one of these mindless ass niggas in the streets, either. I didn’t spend my money on nonsense shit; I stacked my bread. A nigga wanted something to fall back on in case shit hit the fan. Though I was in prison serving time for drug trafficking, I was straight and still getting money, so I wasn’t worried about shit!

  “What’s up, big bruh? This you?” I asked while easing into the passenger seat. Jay’vion got in the driver seat and
shut the door. Nigga had a big ass smile on his face, happy to see me. I ain’t gon’ even lie; I was happy to see him too. That was my mothafuckin’ nigga!

  “Hell yeah, I just got this shit a couple of months ago. Shit clean, ain’t it?” he bragged as he put fire to the Blunt that rested between his lips. I just nodded my head in agreement. Jay’vion handed me an already rolled Blunt and I wasted no time firing that shit up. I needed this weed in the worst way.

  “Damn, this some good shit,” I said between coughs. That little shit they snuck up in the prison wasn’t shit compared to what my brother had just given me. We only fucked with the best, so I wasn’t expecting anything less. “So how’s Ma doing?” I asked once I finally got my coughs under control.

  “She doing good. Crazy as hell, but you already know that.” We both laughed. Our mother, Jackie, was one of a kind—a true character to be exact. She was my little Sour Patch Kid. Her ass was sweet as she wanted to be one minute but would snap on your ass in a blink of an eye. That was my heart, though.

  “Yeah, I can’t wait to see her ass too. Feels like I haven’t seen her the whole four years I been away.”

  “Yeah, well, we can swing by there for a few but we hitting up the club tonight,” my brother said with much excitement dripping from his voice. “They know better than to let a real mothafuckin’ G out on a Friday. Nigga, what?!” he stated as he bounced up and down in his seat. His ass was already amped up!

  “You got-damn right!” I laughed as I relit the Blunt that had gone out.

  Cruising down Interstate-75, Jay was putting me up on game; letting me know what I been missing on the outside world. Shit, from what the nigga was telling me, business was running smoothly, as I already expected it to be. Yeah, my brother might’ve been the boss but you would’ve never guessed that shit. Nigga wouldn’t have half the shit he had or seen half the money he did if it wasn’t for me. It was all good, though. What was mine was his and what was his was mine. We were eating together in this bitch!

  “Man, take me to my crib so I can get dope boy fresh and go get my haircut. I needed this shit cut like yesterday,” I stated while rubbing the top of my head. I usually kept a low fade and hated when that shit started to grow back. I wasn’t one of those pretty boy types, but I did like to keep my shit cut to perfection. Mothafuckas wasn’t about to catch me looking like a bum ass nigga. Jay hopped off the next exit and headed in the direction of my house.

  While I was incarcerated, my brother kept my bills paid and kept my house up to par. I wanted something to come home to. I’d been living in my house since I was seventeen and I refuse to start all over looking for something new when my shit was still A-1. We pulled up to my crib and a nigga couldn’t help but smile.

  “Man, it feels good to be free,” I said as the smile grew wider.

  “I know it does. Aye, check this, I’m gon’ meet you at Mama house. I got moves to make, if you know what I mean.” Jay winked at me with a big ass smile on his face. I just shook my head. Some shit never changed. Nigga was still forever trying to lay up in some pussy. I always told his stupid ass pussy was gon’ be his downfall. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I loved pussy too but that nigga was trying to run up in a different ho damn near every night. Shit, I’d been in the pen for four years; I had an excuse to be horny as fuck. This nigga probably had just fucked before coming to pick me up. Yeah, I’m a hating ass nigga right now—just until I run up in something later, though.

  “A’ight, I’ll see you later.” I threw my right leg out the car but didn’t get out. “Aye, did you stop and get that for me?” I asked.

  “Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. Here,” Jay said while going into the glove compartment and handing me the cell phone I asked him to stop at T-Mobile and get for me.

  “‘Preciate that, bruh. I’ll fuck with you later.” I got out the car and strolled up my walkway to my front door. Pulling my key from my pocket, I unlocked the door and walked in. A smile crept across my lips as the Pine Sol scent invaded my nostril. My shit was spotless. Though I had Jay keeping my shit together, I know he wasn’t cleaning with no damn cleaning supplies, like that. This had a bitch’s name all over it and I was hoping it was my Mama’s name.

  After examining the downstairs area, I headed up the steps, taking two at a time. I don’t know why, because I trusted my brother with my life, but I still inspected the upstairs area thoroughly before heading to the shower. Being that my brother kept my wardrobe up to date, I was able to rock the latest fashions. I was thankful for Jay’vion in more ways than one.

  Throwing on a pair of tan cargo shorts with a black wife beater, I grabbed my fresh-out-the-box black and red Jordan 13s and slipped them on. Ain’t nothing like a pair of fresh Jay’s. It was damn near a hundred degrees outside so a nigga was dressing comfortable. I grabbed my red Atlanta Falcons snapback and put it on over my miniature fro. Grabbing my keys off the dresser, I threw my red Polo T-shirt over my right shoulder and left out the room. Inside the garage, I headed straight to my midnight-black on black 1986 Monte Carlo SS with 26-inch rims. That shit was sexy as hell. See me, I’d always had a thing for old school cars. Cranking it up, I listened as it came to life. It wasn’t long before I hopped in and headed straight to the barber.

  <><><><><>

  Man, I kicked it with those fools at the barbershop for damn near four fucking hours. Them niggas were crazy as fuck! See, that’s one of the things I missed most—sitting around, laughing, smoking, and talking shit. I ain’t never going back to the pen. Mothafuckas couldn’t even piss and shit in private…nope! Nigga couldn’t pay me to go back to that hell hole. I don’t even know how I got caught slipping in the first damn place, but I bet that shit won’t happen again.

  I pulled up to my mama house and it was a car in the driveway. I knew it wasn’t hers because it was parked behind her 2013 Cadillac sedan Jay’vion, told me he’d gotten for her. Let me find out my mama done got her a man while I was gone. Once I parked on side of the road I walked up to the front door. It was opened but the screen door was locked.

  “Yo, Ma, come open the door!” I yelled while banging on it. The fuck she have it locked for and she knew I was coming?! Damn! “Fuck is they doing?” I fussed as I banged on it some more. “Ma!”

  She knew I was impatient as hell. Right then, I saw someone walking up from the hallway. I couldn’t really see their face but I knew it was a female. Nonetheless, I was fucking pissed; it was too damn hot to be out in the hot ass sun knocking on some fucking door. Even so, I wouldn’t tell my mama that shit. Jackie didn’t play that.

  Li’l mama opened the screen door and my mouth fell into a damn ‘O’ shape. Shawty was bad as fuck. She was no taller than 5’5” and weighed no more than a buck thirty. Her breasts were kinda small—just enough to grip—but, her ass was one of the fattest. I mean, that shit was sitting up just right in them little ass jean shorts she was rocking with her grey baby tee and grey, pink and white retro 13s. She had her hair in that natural shit these hos started wearing before I got locked up, but I could tell she had some good hair by the texture and the way her shit was curled up. Shawty’s caramel-colored complexion was glowing with her slightly slanted eyes that made her look like an exotic chink.

  Yeah, her ass could get it! While I was eye fucking her, she was doing the same to me. Only thing was her li’l ass was trying to be discreet with her shit. Not me! I’m a nigga and I’ma look. Fuck that!

  “Who the fuck is you?” I ain’t mean for the shit to come out so blunt, but it did. Oh well. She gave a half smile before moving aside and letting me in. “Where the fuck my ma at?” I then asked since she didn’t answer my first question. She finally pointed down the hall, towards the kitchen.

  “She’s in there,” she said over her shoulders as she led the way. Damn, her ass was fat as fuck. I wondered what she’d do if I slapped that big mothafucka’. I silently thanked God as we entered the kitchen where my mama was sitting. I don’t know how long I could’ve took walking behind this m
ystery woman. Then a nigga was horny as fuck—that shit wasn’t making it any better.

  “Baby!” my mama squealed as she rushed over to me. I was her youngest—her baby boy—so you already know a nigga was spoiled as fuck. Jay was too busy chasing pussy to have time for Mama, but I put nothing before her. Whatever I was doing, I’d drop it for her. She was my queen and no nigga or bitch came before her; not even money.

  “What’s up, lady?” I said, scooping her up in my arms, lifting her off the floor. Her ass had lost hella weight since the last time I saw her, which was two and a half years ago. She mentioned to me that she was having health issues but I didn’t know it was that serious. A nigga wasn’t feeling that shit at all.

  “Mama missed you so much, baby. Yo’ ass better not ever go back to that shit. How you been doing? Let me look you over,” she said while spinning me around. I was slightly embarrassed being that there were two beauties in the room. I wondered who they were, though.

  “Ma, chill,” I laughed as well as everybody else. My mom hugged me once more and kissed my cheek.

  “Come sit down. We been slaving over this hot stove all day, cooking you a welcome home dinner. Wait…where’s Jay’vion at? I thought he was bringing you.” Before I had a chance to answer, she turned to look at the lighter girl. She was bad too but not nearly as bad as the one answered the door for me. “Have you talked to him, Asia?” my mom asked. Damn, was that my brother’s bitch?

  “No, ma’am. I haven’t talked to Jay, since he left the house this morning,” said, who I was suspecting to be my brother’s girlfriend. I heard sadness in her voice and just shook my head.

  “Where he at, Quintez?” my mom then asked me. I hunched my shoulder. Shit, I really didn’t know.

  “I don’t know. I’ll go call him, though.” I got up out my seat and headed to the living room with my phone in my hand. I already knew more than likely I was gonna have to lie for his ass. Though I didn’t know the bitch, I wasn’t about to rat big bruh out.